The Wonky Donkey

Equine Wonders

I know you are busy.

I know Be A Dork Day and Sidewalk Egg Frying Day are a hot minute away. (Look them up. They're official fun days listed for July.)

I know you may, or may not have had your first cup of coffee this morning.

BUT I COULDN’T WAIT ANOTHER SINGLE SECOND to share with you my learned criticism of a delightful and hysterical read-aloud story.

The Wonky Donkey.

For sure, it doesn't rank among the world's literary masterpieces like Dostoevsky's The Brothers Karamazov or Mann's The Magic Mountain. But let me tell you why I love this runaway hit.

First, its main protagonist, a donkey, is endearingly complex.

In what other written classic can you encounter such an intricate development of character? In the expository section, he is introduced as a wonky donkey with only three legs.

Two paragraphs (or stanzas) later, in rising action, he has evolved into a winky wonkey donkey with one eye.

Spoiler alert: by the book's climactic denouement, he has been transformed into a spunky hanky-panky cranky stinky-dinky lanky honky-tonky winky wonky donkey.

Second positive point in this critique: the piece expertly employs rhyming and repetition. Each main division recurrently starts with:

I was walking down the road

and I saw a donkey, Hee haw!

Its rhythmic use of linguistic expression boosts your reading abilities and language development which is a sweet deal to get from a mere tall and slim donkey who likes to listen to country music.

Also, its tone provides you with a cheerful pick-me-up. I challenge you to say this sentence without grinning:

He only had three legs, one eye, he liked to listen to country music,

Book Reading By Second Daughter to
Second Granddaughter's First Grade Class

he was quite tall and slim... and he smelt really, really bad.

When I first read the piece, I’ll admit I couldn’t stop laughing.

So there. I love this book for its imagery, theme, and style. It's so deserving of being an International #1 Bestseller and Viral Sensation.

The perfect go-to read to shake off a stressful day, giggle at, and fall asleep with. I promise, it'll make you smile.

Hee haw!

P.S. A hilarious sequel, The Dinky Donkey, the tailed tale of the Wonky Donkey’s daughter, came out in 2019. 

Water Horse

Equine Wonders

Where have all the feel-good, make-believe movies gone?  

Every time I think I may go to the movies and look, all that are playing are horror films or superhero movies.  No judgment Spider-Man, but I need a really good E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial sometimes.

That's why when The Water Horse was made available to watch on Netflix, I was all in. 

Why wouldn't I?

This film has fantasy and drama and fable. And I love that it starts with, Once upon a time...

... on the shore of Loch Ness, Scotland, a boy named Angus finds an unusual egg.

Then, the plot thickens. The egg hatches, releasing an unexpected surprise. You won’t believe what comes out of it. 

Never.

Not in a million years.

A water horse, the legendary creature from Scottish mythology.

So now, are you in, too?

While the boy tries to keep its existence hidden from his mother, he and Crusoe (which is what the new pet is named), quickly become inseparable. Angus knows that he has found a friend.

But as Crusoe grows larger, eventually becoming the fabled Loch Ness monster, Angus must protect it from those who would want to do it harm. The farm has been commandeered as a posting for a British artillery unit, charged with placing a submarine net across the mouth of the loch.

As fate would have it, the nearby artillery battery soon opens fire upon Crusoe, having mistaken it for a German U-Boat. 

Super pitiful.

Dismal and distressing and heart-rending with a side of lamentable on top.

But then?

Angus leads Crusoe to escape through the net and into the sea.

I just love a sort of happily-ever-after ending, don't you?

But just when you think that's the end, outside a pub, a mother calls out to her son William who is walking down the beach. William has spotted a rock which has an iridescent shell just like Crusoe's.
  
It is said that in all the world, only one Loch Ness is alive at a time. Before it dies, it lays an egg which will produce the next water horse. 

Shall we say it together? Aha! Same story, second telling.

Well, hello baby Nessie.

Looking forward to meet you.

Gurgle! Plop!

Terracotta Warriors And Cavalry

Equine Wonders

Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed

from different sides. - Lao Tzu

You will not want to miss this post. Not a minute. Not a second. This is my number one nominee for the New Seven Wonders of the World.

The Terracotta Warriors and Cavalry in Xi'an, China.

It is said that a group of farmers digging a well nearby had discovered a vast underground city guarded by a life-sized army. It was a burial complex.

Over 7,000 full-scale terracotta warriors and infantrymen.

Horses, chariots and all their attendant armor and weaponry.

A sprawling citadel complete with gardens and stables, bronze ritual vessels, jade jewelry, and a wealth of gold and silver ornaments.

Imagine that!

The soldiers average around 5'11" in height with some as tall as 6'7". Their head, arms and bodies are all hollow with the legs being solid pottery.

The horse statues modeled on the domesticated war-horse are life-sized as well - about 5'6" in height and 6' to 7' long. 

Remarkable. 

The over 2,000-year old funerary art was buried with the First Emperor of China for his protection in the afterlife.

This I will admit to. Having been there, it felt like touching the shadow of a soul. The burial site captured something of the feeling that the dead were a welcome presence among the living.

But not meaning to beat a dead horse (pun fully intended - ha!), I'd say that the rationale for the elaborate entourage eludes me.

Houyhnhnm!

P.S. Give me one of those gorgeous horse sculptures, though, and I'll forever hold my peace.

Calesa

Equine Wonders

The horse, with beauty unsurpassed, strength immeasurable, and grace unlike any other, still remains humble enough to carry a man upon his back. 

– Amber Senti

Raise your hand if you want to learn about a unique means of transport in the Philippines.

Good.

Let me tell you all about the calesa.

It was a primary mode of public and private transportation during the colonial era. 

I know. It’s old-fashioned and vintage. I get it. It is so not even a thing any more. 

But it looks fancy. Sort of. And farmhouse. Kind of like Little House on the Prairie. Plus I suppose there is nothing quite so romantic as a horse-drawn carriage traversing cobble-stoned streets. 

Which is what the calesa is.

So let's start.

You already know it's a two-wheeled inclined cart. Made from wood, metal, or a combination of both, it is commonly vividly painted and gaily-decorated.

The cochero (driver) sits in front. Behind is a single forward-facing bench that can accommodate two passengers. All sit under a canopy originating from the back of the cab.

Nowadays, the horse-drawn calesa largely only survives as a tourist attraction but for me, it hasn't lost  its charm. I think it's beautiful. I love that it signifies travel, movement, and desire. And its best point of appeal is that it is drawn by a single horse.

A spirit animal that raises in so you can set your soul free.

A totem animal that inspires you to jump the hurdles of life with ease.

A power animal that invokes sharpened intuition.

So, ready?

Ya! Gee up!