Touch

Try To Remember

Have a heart that never hardens, and a temper that never tires, and a touch that never hurts. - Charles Dickens

I've heard it said. I can be coldhearted at times. 

My rationale?

I'm not against showing emotions, but there's a time and a place. More so, as my strongest feelings had expired when ignored and taken for granted in the past, I feel that it's the best way to safeguard my heart from re-living the hurt.

But I do care.

All I need is a change from a near frigid to a tropical state of mind. I tell myself that I'll strive to make my life like an open fireplace so that people may be warmed and cheered by it.

I'll remember to open my mind. Realize that I can touch others in all the right places without physical touching. 

Recall that alternatively, touch can be physical affection, skin on skin. Intimacy. When you get weird with someone and find that it's okay.

Maybe I can get the knack of physically reaching out and taking someone's hand. Or, allow someone to take mine. I do remember how a long time ago, being touched like that felt like millions of tiny universes being born and then dying in the space between someone's finger and my skin.

I can start small. Get down pat being chummy with those who don't see my imperfections.

Some angels choose fur instead of wings. - Anonymous

Communicate. Interact and touch the miracle of being alive.

Be present. 

I'll try to remember...

And when I remember, I'll follow.

 

It's Libra Season!

Try To Remember

I'm such a Libra, it's not even funny my sign represents me so well. - Cardi B

In 1974, McDonald’s hamburger cost 28 cents, and a hot apple pie was 26 cents. Also, candy consumers first tasted the rainbow of fruit flavors with Skittles’ hard sugar shells. 

The biggest scandal that hit the US? Yep, it happened that year when Richard Nixon was forced to resign as President after the Watergate scandal.

So, what else transpired in 1974?

I've never been up on the news, but I do know of a single significant event that happened, specifically on September 28, that overshadowed all these.

My rainbow was born.

Two favorite characters of mine in a childhood book were Doreen and Iris. I wanted to be called Doreen, but Mum chose to nickname me Doris instead. 

As for the name Iris, I told myself, Some day, there is going to be an Iris in my life. I just knew there was something especial about that moniker, as I learned some years later in a high school mythology class that it was an appellation for the rainbow goddess. 

That some day came some 49 years ago.

And I try to remember...

The zodiac says that as a Libra, my Iris will exhibit the energy of balance, harmony, and justice.

Represented by the scales, she will strive to maintain equilibrium.

Maybe so, but she is much more. 

Since that time when I realized snuggling with me on the rocking chair might be the last time together before she wasn't a baby anymore, my Iris has grown to be strong, spirited, and beautiful - inside and out.

She lives by the sun and loves by the moon.

Peachy Toes

She has a quiet and sweet side, as well as a fun and crazy side. 

Yes, she's just a normal young woman, but way cooler. 

Wine is the divine juice of September. - Voltaire

I'd drink to that!

What do you say? Let's celebrate. 

It's Libra season!

Happy birthday to 

my September sweetheart!

 

Tastes

Try To Remember 

Pull up a chair. Take a taste. Come join us. Life is so endlessly delicious.

 - Ruth Reichl

This blog is not about taste of success, taste in ideas, or matters of taste. It is literally, taste. The sensation of flavor perceived in the mouth and throat on contact with a substance.

Like the unique pungency from chili peppers and locally-produced yak cheese in Bhutan's signature ema dashi dish.

The sweetness of baklava, a popular pastry of Ottoman cuisine in Morocco; and the rich creaminess from three layers of milk in tres leches from Costa Rica and Mexico.

The ambrosial delectability of many other dishes savored in the course of my international travels comes to mind but, interestingly, what has always been on the forefront in my taste memoirs is one that's neither gourmet nor exotic. 

That of a slice of warm, flaky and sweet apple pie smothered in Rocky Road.

Tasting it for the first time in a small cafe on Cubao Street, I recall that it looked simple.

Unpretentious.

Its principal filling ingredient was...well... apples. With a bare sprinkling of cinnamon. Its topping was not fancy. Creamy chocolate ice cream with chewy marshmallows, crunchy almonds, and flecks of chocolate.

I remember its overwhelmingly fresh, bright, clean flavor. The playful pairing between the tartness of apples and the sweetness of a frozen concoction. It was pert, even chill.

I remember the moment. The company. 

Ah, yes.. My own Michelin star in dessert. So exquisite. 

And I try to remember.

The taste that brands a memory on my soul.

Sounds

Try To Remember 

Each memory has a soundtrack of its own. - Anonymous

It's all about sound. It's that simple.

The noise of rumbling Marikina buses, street noises at night, the rustle of dry leaves burning in a bonfire.

Crunching pan de sal, the creaking bed spring of my blue bed.

Nat King Cole's silky rendition of Autumn Leaves. The train whistle from a long way off. The sound of rain on the galvanized iron rooftop of our home in the compound.

It can be a secret sound, the real sound which is inside you.

Sounds whispered, soul-to-soul, in silence. Never-heard of, yet the silence contains all the sounds, all the words.

These are some of the motley sounds that I like to follow, even as they grow fainter in the far-off, lonely places of my mind each day. 

In listening to them, perhaps I can hear my soul.

Smells

Try To Remember 

The sense of smell is the hair-trigger of memory. - Mary Stewart

Smell is such a potent wizard.

It can transport you across thousands of miles and all the years you have lived. 

In my childhood house, I remember the musky scent of Auntie Luchie's carnation flowers in the front garden. The sweet refreshing aroma, much like honey, of the sampaguita wafting from outside the living room window.

It can be unexpected, momentary and fleeting, yet conjure up merienda afternoons. To this day, if I smell fried bananas, I'm like Pavlov's dog. My mouth starts watering immediately like, Yummy. Gooey, cinnamony turon! 

The sense of smell can be extraordinarily evocative, bringing back pictures as sharp as photographs of scenes that had left the conscious mind. A boating trip at the Burnham Park Lagoon that surrounds you with a pine forest exuding the mellow odor of vanilla and pineapple. Or a chimichanga dinner with its bold and spicy smell competing with the hellish fumes of Phoenix in summer.

Nothing revives the past so completely as a smell that was once associated with it. Perhaps, the scent of someone that you know and someone that you love. The scent of air. Solid and alive.

All these I try to remember.

Scents as old as the world. 

The hundred aromas of a thousand places. 

Images

Try To Remember

 It's funny what you hold on to, the things you remember when everything ends. - Anonymous

I love those random memories that make me smile no matter what is going on in my life at the moment. 

Inspired by the nostalgic song Try to Remember from the musical The Fantasticks, this series is a recollection of my best things when life was low, and oh, so mellow - images that have been embedded in my mind, evocative smells, sounds, rousing memories of a certain taste, the poignant remembrance of a touch. 

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There was a time when I remembered things quickly and easily. Now, not so much.

I have had to dig through the bottom of my crammed adult closet for those especial moments, unforgettable experiences, and cheerful celebrations with people who matter to me. 

So many of them.

I try to remember. 

Birthdays, re-connecting with loved ones...

Family vacations, yuletide, crafting for Easter...

School events, May Day, recital prep days...

Too tired to sleep, 

too sleepy to hooman.

Then and now in Hawaii...

How did they grow so fast?

Missions, gorging on ramen...

The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating.

I remember things that fill my heart without their trying.

Unexpected moments that become my best memories.

Azul nestled in his coffee can house...

Priscilla with her green eyes, purring...

Chip the chipmunk atop his tunneled home in the sandbox, hoarding a piece of Papa Johns pizza in his mouth...

Lexi cuddling with her new favorite squishy-mallow friend, Matt...

Beau Bean snuggly tucked into his hemp bedding...

The surprise of a blue robin egg.

A scapular from the Mission Church.
Tucson: 2022 

Even as I recollect the good times, I also remember the sadness. Images of people who have walked in and walked out of my life.

I remember being saved by grace when I succeeded, but I remember it much more when I failed.

It is said that as you get older, three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.

At least, I can still hang out or talk with old friends from high school and say, Remember when?

More so, thank God for photographs.

Perhaps, in the sunset of my life, they will help me remember.

Sunset on Waikiki Beach. Photo: VEV, Hawaii: 2023